Today, Poromenos turns an astoundingly ancient 22 years old.

There are many reasons why 22 is a remarkable milestone. Let’s run down a few of them.

  1. It is a multiple of 11, and multiples of 11 make the ladies hot
  2. In certain sub-Saharan countries, 22 is the age at which men must wrestle large alligators for tribal supremacy. Whoever gets eaten the least becomes leader of the tribe. Those who fail to not get eaten… well they get eaten and nobody really cares.
  3. 22 is the exact age at which Mozart wrote his 187th opera entitled “Does anyone even listen to these anymore?” starring Tom Cruise and Barry Manilow. Incidentally, 187 is also a multiple of 11.
  4. $22 gets you a bucket of chicken and a 40 oz. bottle of malt liquor in Detroit. 22 euros buys you a house and 11 Swiss manservants.

For all these reasons and more, happy birthday Poro. Please leave your love in the form of comments and T-shirt orders.