If you have a blog and can’t find anything to write, read a woman’s magazine. They’re so full of crap that they’re guaranteed to make you puke and share your hate for them with the world. This is the case of this post. I just found one of my sister’s magazines lying around, so I thought “I’ll just read this for a bit, maybe it will give me some insight in women”. Well, the only insight it gave me is that women (actually it’s just that particular writer, but I figure if that magazine stereotypes men and sells that well, I’ll stereotype women, it can’t hurt) are unbelievably and mind-bogglingly stupid.

It was a column about sex advice or sex situations (I doubt that even the writer knows exactly) that dealt with what happens if you do certain things (or people). For example, one of the cases was the “pity lay”, where you have sex with someone you don’t really want to, just because you kinda like them. Her conclusion was that it is very wrong and that “you come to when someone on you yells something like ‘I’m coming’ and you feel so relieved it’s over that you will almost want to kiss him — but you don’t”. That’s cool, I can agree with that. I don’t enjoy sex with women I don’t want to have sex with either. Very well so far.

In the next case, this piece of shit, this unbelievable dreck goes on to say something far more preposterous. Before I tell you what it is, I would like to note that I hate this magazine and its ilk. I would not even wipe my ass with it because my sphincter would be so offended that it would close up and kill me of shit poisoning. These abominations are even printed on glossy paper which takes forever to biodegrade. Anyway, the next case is about the “desperate lay”. In this case, a desperate woman gives a desperate man permission to do the unthinkable and have sex with her, even though normally she would be way too good for him, but, she is as we said, desperate. Wake-up call, bitch, if you were all that hot you wouldn’t be desperate in the first place, but I’ll let this one slide.

Anyway, the woman has sex with the man and realises that he just makes her give him lots of blowjobs and leaves her and never calls back. Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with you? How low must your IQ be to think this? First of all, you ignorant, ignorant piece of shit of a writer, what kind of a desperate man would never call a woman he just had sex with back? Secondly, does it never cross your mind, before so ignorantly assuming that all men are evil, that there is a chance a desperate guy would be, you know, actually nice? And to top it all off, since when is sex something a woman gives? When two people have sex, they (hopefully) both consent to it, and they (again hopefully) both enjoy it. I fucking detest the notion that men beg women for sex, and women, being the noble creatures that they are, find it in their hearts to grace some poor man with their infinite kindness and allow him to have sex with them, something that women don’t enjoy at all, and, in fact, find somewhat distasteful.

Wake the fuck up. It’s the same for both men and women. Both the man and the woman were desperate. They had a night of desperate sex and probably both enjoyed it. If you know you’re not going to like the sex because the man is desperate, why not just spend the three fucking dollars to buy yourself a dildo and spare us the fucking crap? I must e-mail this bitch and give her a piece of my mind.

The rest of the article is about the same. It goes on endlessly talking about women as if they’re all hot and smart and wonderful people and men are the walking scum of the earth and they don’t deserve any woman. I’m thinking of rallying up all the men and agreeing not to have sex with any woman that has these views. Hey, she’s too good to have sex with men anyway. Or maybe the writer is a lesbian, in which case, forget I said anything.