Recently I have been told that if I gave a monkey a typewriter he would write better than me, and that gave me an idea. Why don’t I give a monkey a typewriter? I had a laptop instead of a typewriter and I searched everywhere for a monkey but I couldn’t find one, so I did the next best thing. I fed a markov chain generator program all my previous posts and watched as it generated pieces of brilliance. A sample of its work follows, edited for clarity.

Having fruitlessly tried to lick a frozen signpost when she was 18, and I smell like roses anyway. That was sheer genius though. Bored. Another mediocre post (Oh well, maybe we’ll get a ThreeOrMoresome going). After a while, they finished their gig and it was not the brightest bulb in the untimely death of 3,198 slaves in Speicherstufler’s possession. Speicherstufler, after realising that he is one great tree though, I went back and hit them while they’re there. The movie’s pace begins to pick up when they speak Spanish. In Spain, they speak Norwegian. In Norway (who would go like this) Crom: Ugh Three Dumb Men: Whatever C: What the fuck! I went to the other part where Vincent hops onto the train, James Bond-style and kicks everyone’s ass on there too. The power in the store was one of the man had no choice in the nuts. She looks mean.

What the hell do you think should be done about our country’s educational system? AC(Aaron Campbell): Hello John, it’s good fun anyway. What is it, girls, do you remember how in that order. As soon as I know, which, admittedly, is not the brightest bulb in the fucking lyrics, it’s not worth the $700 you have time. Omg teh drivar is going through, and they’re all like “boo, take the radio which emits static whenever zombies are near (either zombies emit electromagnetic waves or the oral cavity)”. I am writing this or killing the owner while they’re there. The movie’s pace begins to pick it up, but he also thought, hoping that One-eye Jimmy had been oozing little brown shitties ever since, which led me to remember than for you to know. My cunning wit and the other woman with a girl you like, but you have a headache. No you don’t. If you can’t explain something, or “Trust me, I know this because two of my predicament”. At least we say bye or something and this is a giant Tarantula spider (we’ll call him Jichael Mackson).

The creators of Star Trek, Star Wars, ADnD and the Statue of Liberty also has its standards, deal with us, we were blowing some random dog. A friend of mine, though, had the very very lucky my laptop battery wasn’t dead.

Well, there goes my immersion. Of course, using the long piece of wood with nails on one end that I have always thought they came where they throw you off a cliff you think “I really should have talked to her.” or when you can follow to cut down on the phone bill. I have a chick whom you just met in your bed. This makes her mad because it had the great Rammstein out of another category, shut up. You’re wrong.

Having fruitlessly tried to get laid, we got a new paragraph after only two lines of text. This movie featured some great acting, such as “They Don’t Care About Us” to protest the racism of the hardest for me to cogitate about the “desperate lay”. In this quest they meet many a viewer has died from it. If you think I will share with you people? (There were, of course, she’s hot). Warning: You should clean the pot and stuff RIGHT AWAY, otherwise, much like cows looking at me, call me at ilovestrippers@microsoft.com. There is no such gift and gave it to soften the cream. I hope I have ADD. Panties.

This text was about 0.1% of what the program generated, and I think it is safe to say that I couldn’t write such ingenious pieces even if I were on crack. From now on I’ll leave the program to do all the posting and retire in the deepest recesses of my cave. If you liked this post comment on it, and I will consider posting some more of this ingenuity at a later time.