What a perverse world…
A wise man once said “Treat her rough, get some muff”. When I heard this I immediately dismissed it as codswallop, but last night my skepticism was shattered by the events that transpired.
There is a bar near where I live called ‘Phil’s’. It is dark, dingy, and smells of feet and hockey equipment at the end of a day-long tournament. However, it has $1.75 drinks, so we go. I went with my buddy Nathan; my roommate and wingman extrodinaire Kevin; Virginia, my former lab partner, and her friends. It was partway into the night when I found myself beset by Kevin and Nathan shouting at me to go hit on this random girl in a pink shirt. I protested that I am not ‘that guy’, which they did their best to refute using the logical tools available to them (‘Yes you are!’).
While I was being verbally pummeled for my lack of will to bother random girls in bars, a group of ladies came up to talk to Nathan, having apparently met him some time before. To get my two harping buddies to leave me alone, I decided to undecoriously perform a suicide mission on one of the girls there so they would leave me alone. To compound the inevitable failure, I decided to be the biggest jerk I could possibly imitate. I made nothing but disparaging comments about her every statement, ridiculed her in front of her friends… I was theatrically rude.
Nothing in my many years of bar-going could prepare me for what happened next.
Far from being offended or discouraged from further conversation, this girl (who we shall call Cyndi) was intrigued by my ruthless and irreverent banter. The more I berated and disparaged her, the more interested she seemed. I’m pretty sure that if I had punched her she would have gone down on me.
I ask you people, what kind of sense does it make that being nice, courteous, complimentary and generally decent is a turn off? If I met a girl who upon meeting me immediately began talking shit, it would be SO OVER. Why should I have to pretend to be an asshole just to get the time of day and a dance?
The story doesn’t end as well as you might think: we spent a good portion of the evening grinding each other into oblivion on the dance floor, then her roomies (who were giving me some serious stink-eye) had to go home, so she left. I did get her number though… worship me for I am your god.
this girl is an anomaly…trust me, a normal woman does not respond to a man in this way…try this again…i betcha it won’t work!
Comment on July 25, 2006 @ 9:34 pm
Heh, annoying well-known fact that screws over decent guys like me – females are naturally attracted to the ones that assert themselves as the alpha male.
Ah well, helps narrow it down to girls who can think for themselves, anyway…
Comment on July 28, 2006 @ 5:38 pm
That’s true, it does narrow it down to those two girls. I’d better start asserting…
Comment on July 28, 2006 @ 7:22 pm
For a more in depth “explanation” and a tut that might change your life (did wonders for me) check out David Deangelo (sorry for the “shameless plug”, I’m not affiliated tho, just a fan)
http://www.doubleyourdating.com/
You don’t have to be a “jerk” but that comment about alpha male is more on point then you might think. And there is a way to be Alpha and not a jerk off….
hth
Comment on July 29, 2006 @ 8:51 pm
Olesya, I’m eagerly awaiting the exception to the jerk rule. If you know this girl, tell her to give me a ring. However, as I said to this girl in question on the phone, I have friends who are jerks, and I have friends who are nice guys. I also know a lot of attractive girls… none of them are going after the nice guys.
I’m not suggesting that this one-off case study accurately represents all of the female sex. However, it is suspicious that in the hundreds of times I’ve been to a bar and chatted up a girl, the one time I’m a total asshole is the time that I am this successful.
Comment on July 31, 2006 @ 10:15 am
Ok, here it is. I am this girl. The kinda girl that doesn’t go for the assholes. Or “jerks.” Simply because I’ve had my share of them, and their rudeness doesn’t impress me. What a female looks for in a guy is just confidence, someone who isn’t afraid to take the initiative, but stays respectful while doing so.
And I’m also not saying that every girl thinks of it that way. Hell, now that I think about it, most girls are stupid enough to get involved with guys who treat them like total garbage. Just because they are, well, girls. Women are different – with experience comes maturity, with maturity the “jerks” simply loose their appeal.
And one more thing, it’s impossible to split men into just two narrow categories: jerks and the nice guys. It’s so much more complicated than that, and so many other factors come into play when “attractive” girls choose their counterpart. So my piece of advice is, treat a woman with respect – or be a jerk, and you’ll end up meeting a bitch that’ll ruin your life
P.S. Keep up the good work guys, I love reading your blogs.
Comment on July 31, 2006 @ 11:30 pm
Yeah, well, I’m still waiting to meet a girl like that, sadly.
Comment on August 1, 2006 @ 6:42 am
Actually it is pretty easy to divide guys into two distinct categories. These are:
1) Guys who wish they were me
2) Guys who are me
I’ll give you a minute to wrap your mind around that one… take your time… okay?
So yeah, the self-confidence thing sure is fine, but your theory breaks down a bit, because I have twice been rejected for a job because I was TOO self-confident, and yet I am not choc-a-block with dripping women. I blame this on the communists, and the Turks. Friggin’ janissary motherfuckers.
Oh and BTW, “Cyndi” said I was smooth in the manner of Jim from “The Office” (for those of you that like good TV shows). So in your face, people who said I wasn’t smooth in the manner of Jim from “The Office” (for those of you that like good TV shows)!
Comment on August 2, 2006 @ 9:04 am
Ok…this is for all the guys in the second category only. Everyone else – stop reading, lest you take offense.
I never said that confidence is a guaranteed ticket to the land of ‘dripping women.’ And you being rejected for a job because you were too self confident? Maybe you mean you talked a lot of crap and couldn’t back it all up on your resume? But blaming it on the communists…I’m with you on that.
Anyway, I just figured out another problem that you men have when it comes to dealing with women. You just don’t listen. Or you do, but end up misunderstanding the whole thing somehow. Perhaps, this “Cyndi” actually DID find you attractive, and it wasn’t because you were being a jerk…but maybe because this ‘one out of a hundred’ women actually liked YOU (and would have liked you even if you weren’t a jerk). I’ll give you a minute to wrap your mind around that one…take your time…okay?
Comment on August 2, 2006 @ 10:38 pm
No, you’re wrong there. I’ve seen Crommunist, no woman would ever find him attractive, it was because he was being a jerk.
Comment on August 3, 2006 @ 6:23 am
haha fine. I trust your word for it and throw my whole theory to the wind
Comment on August 3, 2006 @ 8:12 am
Throw your bra too please
Comment on August 3, 2006 @ 9:01 am
hahaha…nice…but no thanks. I don’t wear bras. :p
Comment on August 3, 2006 @ 7:22 pm
No tits, huh… :/
Comment on August 4, 2006 @ 4:25 am
um actually…but that’s none of ur business perv. :p
Comment on August 4, 2006 @ 7:02 pm
THere is a difference, being a rude guy and rude jokes just marks one as being insecure.
Comment on February 3, 2007 @ 8:32 am